County Antrim woman, 24, raising awareness of kidney disease as she awaits crucial transplant

Emma Kearns, from Dunloy, is currently living with Stage 5 renal failure.

Although the 24-year-old has had lifelong kidney issues, her health took a sudden decline earlier this year.

“For a long time I had unknowingly been feeling the effects of my kidney disease. I couldn’t figure out why I had constant nausea, was extremely lethargic and had awful hypertension,” said Emma, a former pupil of Dominican College in Portstewart.

Following some routine tests by her doctor, she was shocked to discover her kidney function had dropped to just 15 percent.

It was a sharp decrease from the previous August, when it had sat at 25 percent.

The news meant that Emma, who had settled in Liverpool after graduating from John Moores University in the city, had to return abruptly home to Northern Ireland.

"I had to leave my friends, my job, my home and my partner, Isaac,” she said. “I was devastated, and felt like this was the end for me. I was terrified of leaving everything behind and had to face this new life, this unknown fear of what was to come.

“I never thought I’d have to be dealing with this at my age.”

Making the situation even more difficult was the fact that such advanced kidney failure is rare in younger people. “I didn’t know anyone else of a similar age going through this, so trying to find people to relate to and befriend so as to not feel so alone was a struggle for me.”

The Northern Ireland Kidney Patients Association has been a valuable source of support for Emma as she awaits a kidney transplant.

She is currently on the deceased donor list, with family members also being tested to see if they could be a match as a living donor.

“Isaac wanted to get tested to do whatever he could to help, and I had friends wanting to get tested as well,” she added.

However, her doctors advised that any living donor be over the age of 30, further reducing the pool of potential matches.

The introduction of Dáithí's Law earlier this year has led to greater public awareness on organ donation, but for many like Emma, the process of finding a suitable donor remains a lengthy one.

And while she is immensely grateful for the gift of organ donation, many in her position can feel a sense of guilt too. “I want to thank those who have donated, or have loved ones no longer with us who have saved countless lives by donating,” Emma continued.

“It is an admirable thing to do, one you should be extremely proud of. I cant help feeling guilty at the fact I need a kidney, and will be taking one from a family member or a deceased donor. I think I feel guilty because I know that this is a massive, massive ask.

"I feel guilty if I take a deceased donor kidney, because I don’t know this person, and they would be giving me the greatest gift I could have and I will never have a way to thank them. I feel guilty if I take a family member’s kidney, because they are doing this simply for me and have to go through the testing and pain of doing so. I don’t think the guilt is talked about enough, I don’t think many understand the guilt recipients may feel.

“A new organ gives me the chance to finally, for the first time in my life perhaps, know what it feels like to feel well, to feel a sense of normality.”

The medical team who will be dealing with the transplant, meanwhile, have been “incredible”, she added: “The doctors and nurses in Antrim Area Hospital and meeting James McDaid, who will hopefully be performing my transplant have all been exceptional. They have explained everything to me in detail and have greatly eased my fears about the surgery and what comes after.”

With her kidney function having decreased further to 13 percent in recent weeks, Emma’s general health has taken a decline. “I am struggling to walk distances without becoming exhausted after a short period of time, so I have had to resort to a wheelchair. I have very low energy and struggle to go places without soon needing a nap.

"I have a hidden disability lanyard, but I still get funny looks from people who don’t think I look unwell.”

The ongoing situation has also taken its toll on her mental health. “I have tried to avoid talking about as I don’t want anyone else in my family or friend circle to feel responsible for trying to improve it. My situation is what it is,” Emma said.

"The hardest part for me is the waiting. I feel like I am constantly waiting for a call to say there is a kidney readily available for me. Unfortunately I know it isn’t that simple. I cling to the hope that someday soon I will have my kidney.

"I remind myself this is a temporary setback, and if sharing my story can help one person in a similar situation feel related to, then I consider it a positive outcome.”

The Northern Ireland Kidney Patients’ Association (NIKPA) provides support for kidney dialysis patients and kidney transplanted patients and their families.